I am heartbroken to say I lost Suki to colic.

The barn owner called me Sunday evening to say she looked off and the vet was on the way. Because of the distance I lived from the barn, I immediately started preparing to leave. When the emergency vet called me, the update was not good – Suki didn't respond to treatment and the vet recommended hauling her in to an emergency clinic.

While the barn owner loaded her up and took her in, I started driving. By the time I arrived at the emergency vet, they were prepping Suki for surgery. I was able to see her for a couple minutes, and even sedated it was clear she was very uncomfortable.

Unfortunately, once the vet started surgery, it was clear that Suki's chances of surviving surgery and recovering after were very poor.

Making the call to euthanize is never easy. I'll do everything in my means to give an animal a fighting chance, but in this case there was simply too much stacked against her.

I am very fortunate that I had so much support up to that point: the barn owner who handled everything while I was driving out, the vets who responded quickly and were very honest in their assessments of the situation. Even the insurance company, while it added some extra bureaucracy to the situation, was professional and supportive. 

I feel like I was only just getting to know Suki when I lost her, and I am honestly feeling a little lost right now. She had so much potential, and I was so excited for our future together. 

It's easy to say this is the worst part of owning horses, and it's true. I've been saying that a lot over the last few days, like saying it will make the situation somehow easier or less painful. 

Mostly, though, this just sucks. There's no eloquent way to phrase it, no wrapping it up in something that makes it sound like anything other than what it is: a horrible end to a too-short life that should have been so much more.